Project Life: Paris Day One

I am officially behind on Project Life. It's causing me anxiety even thinking about it but with the help of Jennifer Kang, I've decided to do a two page PL spread and then document Paris through a mini album (:

sacrifice

Expectations lead to disappointment, and being disappointed is comparable to heartbreak (at the least in the overly-dramatic sense). In Paris I experienced extreme happiness, I'd come close to even saying joy. I have to interject by saying that I'm not miserable, but until Paris, I didn't truly understand how tired I was and how much personal happiness lacked from my life. While in Paris I caught a mild cold, developed a pretty serious sinus infection and by the time I landed and returned to work the next day, I could not hear out of my left ear. Despite this, I was so happy- so happy to have been able to experience Paris with one of my greatest friends.

It took a measly two days to remember why doing the work that so many of us do makes us burn out. I care deeply for my students and essentially have invested the past eight months of my life to them. As a result, I very fairly have certain expectations of them. I know they do and will continue to make poor choices and talk back and waste my time, but at the end of the day I expect them to at least respect the space we have all worked together to build.

I've had posturing and fights in my room and school before, but I did not realize that I hadn't seen a real real fight. That is, until this past Thursday, when two of my boys truly fought. I cried (in front of my children mind you) out of shock, disappointment and fright- to see two of my children engage in that type of way brought me back to reality. All of us in this field sacrifice our happiness because there's something wrong when students stand and watch two of their peers fight without a care in the world and their teacher cries.

Monday in Paris

Being in Paris is like being in a tiny little dream bubble. I walk around and I see beautiful buildings, preserved streets, and an incredible amount of people in love. Paris (and Europe in general) never intrigued me- I didn't see what more it could offer me than any other western city. Oh how I was wrong! Everything about Paris is Parisian. It's inspiring to be immersed by such locality, so inspiring that I feel ashamed that I have totally caught the tourist bug!

Joii and I at Moulin Rouge!

Questions I have asked myself since arrival:

1. Why are there soldiers walking around with machine guns?

2. Why is everyone so thin (I'm thinking this is because everyone smokes- but I could be wrong)?

3. Why are all the doorknobs here large and centered on doors?

March Birchbox

I finally decided to sign myself up for Birchbox after months of wondering whether it'd be worthwhile. My first box came in February, and I have to say that I was slightly disappointed (though not completely!). My samples weren't as 'deluxe' sized as I thought they'd be and I received mostly skincare products with one beauty product. This said, I did love the fact that the box was naturally focused and the creme they sent is to die for.

This months theme was about glitz and glam! Birchbox teamed up with TeenVogue this month so I had the option of opting for the collaborative box (which I did and am glad I went for it!) instead of the regular March Birchbox. I absolutely love everything that came in this months box (: Here is a full list of the products I received:

-essie luxeeffect as gold as it gets (full sized)

-tarte matte lip color

-twirl by kate spade

-twistband hair tie

-kerastase hair oil

-ModCloth ten dollar coupon

SO, I urge you all to become Birchbox members! Men- there are rumors that they'll be launching a men's edition soon- so keep an eye out (:

ProjectLife

This lovely little lady and I decided that we were going to start a project in 2012. I am in LOVE with ProjectLife and I spend time each Sunday working on my ProjectLife (: . Knowing that I have one page a week to complete forces me tolook for moments in my weekto celebrate. While I have to carve out time to get this project done, it excites me to know that my first year out of college will be thoroughly documented! I don't spend any time being crafty (though I wish I had the time to) so I encourage you busy people to consider this project. It is farless costly and time consuming than scrapbooking.

Here are a few pages documenting 2012:

racial profiling at its best.

i took the day off from work as a result of my long awaited date with traffic court. The best way for me to describe the way I looked entering the building is a fish out of water. I was quickly approached by an officer for assistance. He gave me instructions on what to do and when he saw that my courtoom had not yet entered and I was uncomfortably standing in the midst of a see of men of color, he called out and told me to stand next to him. He prepped me for what I'd say in trial and I smiled back at him, feeling a little guilty for dumbing down my intelligence momentarily. (this nice gentleman even came to my courtroom for my trial!)

I entered my courtroom and the ONLY white people were the officers, the judge, attendants and lawyers. Every person at trial was either black, hispanic, an immigrant asian, and predominantly male. When I went to make my statement the judge asked me what happened. When I told him I was driving home from work he asked me why I was in that area and I told him I was a teacher in North Philly and he looked at me like he didn't believe me (until I gave him the address of where I worked). He asked a couple more questions and then just said, I'm going to discharge you. All of a sudden two tickets were dropped and I left without any points on my license. While thrilled with this verdict, I felt ashamed walking out the back doors knowing that every person tried before me, even if the points on their license were dropped, left with a fine and signed up for a payment plan.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't completely aware that my race, gender, and socio-economic status did not work in my favor today.

too.good.to.be.true.

For the past couple of weeks I can honestly say that I've come close to a work life balance. I've been co-teaching with a great friend and teacher and it has been incredible. I had come to a point where I wasn't spending an exuberant amount of time making work packets and stressing over my classroom management. My students' behavior has been improving and I had blocks of class that were completely silent as they listened and followed instruction. Co-teaching has done wonders for my children.

In the middle of her goodbye party I was experiencing severe heat flashes. I turn to our school social worker and say "Is it just me or is it terribly hot in here?"...she responds by saying "That is your feeling of panic".

yup.

panic.

As of Monday, I will be teaching a self-contained class of seventh and eighth graders. alone.

My caseload just doubled and I now teach two more subjects.

yup.

panic.